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As I sit and compose this entry, I find myself thinking about how I always thought I would never be one to broadcast my thoughts and feelings via a forum like this. I've never been one to put things out for so many to see, however I find today that it be a necessity that i do, not as a plea for attention, nor a cry for help, but as an outlet. A means to get things of my chest and to say things I never thought I would say as I do not have a pre-disposition to experience what I have been feeling lately, which is depression. For a variety of compounding reasons, I feel as though depressed is what I have become. Not to the severity that is alarming, but one that is definitely beginning to affect my daily life. I, as I am sure many others have as well, have lost a lot over the past couple of years. Between people who I had become very close to and for one reason or another have pulled away, people who have passed away far too soon, and even people who are still present but the dynamic of the relationship and frequency of communication changing drastically have all taken their toll on me emotionally. Couple that with financial and professional pressures that have been mounting and that is what has brought me to this point today. I understand these are all part of life but the sheer weight and circumstance of each particular incidence has been difficult as they add up.
I said earlier that this wasn't a plea and it's not, at least not a direct one, however reading back I consider that maybe it is an indirect one in that I wish that things may change. That maybe some of those people who have pulled away will reconnect. Their absences have left a hole and I would love for them to not be afraid to take those steps, to open those doors, and become a part of my life again, in any capacity. For the relationships where the dynamics have changed, that they would settle into stability. These are the things which have caused me to lament for a while now, I'm not looking to illicit sympathy, I only hope that things will return to the way things used to be as much as possible.
I said earlier that this wasn't a plea and it's not, at least not a direct one, however reading back I consider that maybe it is an indirect one in that I wish that things may change. That maybe some of those people who have pulled away will reconnect. Their absences have left a hole and I would love for them to not be afraid to take those steps, to open those doors, and become a part of my life again, in any capacity. For the relationships where the dynamics have changed, that they would settle into stability. These are the things which have caused me to lament for a while now, I'm not looking to illicit sympathy, I only hope that things will return to the way things used to be as much as possible.
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Medical leave
Hi everyone. i just wanted to let you all know that i am still here, but someone close to me has recently been diagnosed with cancer and that's kind of been taking up a fair bit of my time. i'll continue to be active here, but the amount will depend day to day on how things are going on the medical front. thanks for understanding and bearing with me during this period. i'll talk to you all soon.
-Master
dA Availability
Hello, all. Now that I have everyone's requirements out at least, I will be getting on a set schedule, more or less. I expect to be on dA every Monday, Thursday, and Saturday, focusing on notes for sure, and at times I will be in the chat room. That being said, I will also be making exceptions at times for the chat room, either by my own decision or at the request of a slave, with a "scheduled" time.
As for priority, I am currently completing old rps in notes, and as I finish those, I will starting a new note rp with new additions to the mansion. As always though, chat room, skype, and chatzy rps can be slotted in at convenient times as they
Back And Excited To Get Back Into Things
Hello all. Pets, slaves, and friends. First I want to apologize for my repeated extended absences. Real life and the need to focus on someone close to me going through a VERY difficult time has kept me from this side of dA. That being said, I am back and ready to continue all my existing commitments and role plays. I will be contacting EVERYONE in the next few days and asking if they wish to continue, start over, or simply pack in what we were doing at the time of my disappearance. I do sincerely hope to continue with each of you in some way shape or form, abiding by the new specs I have established for myself and my rps, outlined on my profi
Merry Christmas, Happy Holidays, Moving Forward
First off, I would like to wish a merry Christmas and/or happy holidays to all my pets, slaves, and friends. I hope you all have a safe and enjoyable time with your friends and loved ones. I know it's been a strange year, a difficult one in terms of my lack of time on here which I am deeply sorry for, and that brings me to the "moving forward" part of this journal. I've decided that no matter what happens, I am budgeting three days a week to spend on deviantArt. It's not fair to those who I have left hanging in my absence to handle pressing matters IRL, so starting at the beginning of January, I will be on dA to reply and interact on Mondays,
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Comments22
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I can understand your weariness to post about feelings. Considering your position, it's not unusual to try and keep things inside.
That said, depression is nothing to be taken lightly. I myself suffer from it, and I find the best way to combat it is to disconnect from the issue at hand. I'd understand if you'd take out less time for certain activities or responsibilities. The only issue'd be to completely pull away.
What with those you once held dear, it's rather upsetting to hear they've lost contact with you. But dwelling on them not contacting you could be contributing to the depression.
You probably know all this already. But I'm just stating what I know of my own situation...
I hope you get well soon, my friend.
That said, depression is nothing to be taken lightly. I myself suffer from it, and I find the best way to combat it is to disconnect from the issue at hand. I'd understand if you'd take out less time for certain activities or responsibilities. The only issue'd be to completely pull away.
What with those you once held dear, it's rather upsetting to hear they've lost contact with you. But dwelling on them not contacting you could be contributing to the depression.
You probably know all this already. But I'm just stating what I know of my own situation...
I hope you get well soon, my friend.